information ----> ______

information ----> ______
what is it about anomalies that attract information?
we burn a hole in our minds trying to answer questions;
it's a biological tick.

this certainly is not an exit...

everything is not tidy!
nothing WILL be tidy

a computer wizard once told me:
with electronic information, moving towards permanance is moving in the wrong direction
(ok, so it was just gary who said that)

is anything permanent in this oxydizing world?

the tension that exists as my static state of being is in direct relation to the tidiness of things

and the reality that this pursuit is futile does not open some relief valve and WOOSH there goes my unease, no, it's constant

rivendell will never be clean, the suburban will never be finished

in 8th grade as we graduated middle school, they asked us to write our goal under our yearbook picture. i wrote: "to be satisfied with myself"
What kind of 8th grader writes that????? and who wants an unatainable goal? Wow, what was I on?

and there's no road map for this sort of thing. it is now that you are supposed to find God. Or some epiphone happens when you stumble and hit your head. Or you lose something irreplaceable. Or you sign up for ECT and end up like McMurphy in One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest. Or you buy something valuable. Or you destroy something special.

Is this life an escalator that only goes the speed that I trod?

I feel like a combine shredding everything in my path and leaving it in a pile behind me....